happy

2018 Chapter I Section 7

A little late but still a start

The first Sunday of 2018! So, I took a bit of time off writing in the latter half of last year and also in the first few days of this one. And, it was worth it. I have a lot going on and yet I feel like I am standing still. I am looking for work, trying to further my studies (I am thinking about a second Masters and trying for it) and definitely making sure I am healthier than before. It has been a struggle sometimes to lose weight and eat right. When things don't go well I always depend on food to make me feel better. I want to change that. I want to be my own support system. 

I have been trying a new way of eating: Ketogenic diet. I know there is a lot of controversies around it and initially, I was very apprehensive about it. I have to say till now it has been the most successful way of eating for me. I am less hungry and more focused. I have been able to finally go under 179 lbs in 3 years and stay there. I have had my own bit of struggle with it, but I am back at it strong. One of the things I do not like about this way of eating is that I end up eating a lot of meat and dairy products. But, slowly and steadily I have been switching over to the plant-based alternatives. One of my goals in 2018 is to eat more plant-based foods. This is not only for health reasons but I want to leave less of a bad carbon footprint. 

I have also started Intermittent Fasting. It was a struggle, a true struggle but with time I have realized because of IF I eat less junk food now. I am more aware of what I am putting in my mouth and when. Earlier I had a habit of eating chips and chocolates at 1 or 2 in the morning. But, because of the specific times, I can eat, I eat better and get the right calories in. 

I tried different forms of exercise last year; from interval training to running to swimming but I couldn't sustain any of them, and I realized because I never addressed my back issues or other health issues. And, though I would start strong with my exercises, I would inevitably fall sick. This year my plan is to start slow and maintain. Thanks to my chiropractor my back pain is minimal and I sleep better. I want to start slow with walking. I also realized I love to dance and music always makes me happy. So, I have decided to dance for 10 mins every morning right after I wake up. I have done it for a few days and that has been a good experiment. I end up happier throughout the day.

So, basically this year I will continue to improve upon all the healthy habits and knowledge I started and accumulated last year! 

Last year was good. It definitely did not go as planned and that is fine. I met some exceptional people from all over the world. And, I cannot be more thankful. This has been one of the most eye-opening experiences in my life. Seeing the same things from a different perspective can be such a revelation.

I have realized my worth and I have realized I do not need to feel worthy through other's words. My actions speak for them. I have cut off a few people from my life, people who at one point in my life made sense, made me happy but I feel their presence in my life now is more harmful. 

This is a big year for me as I turn 30 and I have a short bucket list, that I want to go through (I will try putting some of them in this blog, some are too private for me to share here, though I am pretty sure I am the only one who reads my blog).

In general, I want to be happy this year and make sure I make others happy. I do not know where I will be at the end of the year. I do not know if I will be able to do all that I want to. I do not know if I will be successful in my endeavors but I know at every single moment I can choose happiness and that is exactly what I wish to do. 

I also want to be a lot more mindful of others and the world in general. I want to give as much as possible for me at the moment and I want to be aware of my surroundings. I am slowly switching to a more minimalistic approach to life, I have started having more plant-based foods and switching to products which are homemade and more natural. I know I cannot go cold turkey overnight but I can choose to keep making these small changes this year. 

A few goals I have for myself this year: 

  • Lose the excess weight I have been carrying around for a while now. It's time to treat my body with more respect and give it the right nutrients. 
  • Read more and read things out of my comfort zone. Goal is to read 52 books this year. 
  • Meet more people. Be more social. 
  • Help out more, in whatever small way I can. 
  • Write every single day (yes, I know I have missed the first 6 days already, but hey at least I started). I want to make this a memoir that I can go back to and read and be reminded of who I am, it seems sometimes I forget that. Also, I will be tracking a lot of my food and exercise and reading habits through this. I want to make it like my own one-stop shop diary.
  • Slowly change food habits to more plant-based. 
  • Be more environmentally aware. 
  • Learn more. Be it from books, online, from people, from college. I want to increase my knowledge. 
  • Learn a new language (I am currently trying to learn Spanish). 
  • Be Happy. There are too many reasons to become sad, angry, frustrated with life, others, the world, with yourself. But, I can choose happiness over everything else and that is what I want to do more. Everything on this list are just meant to make sure I achieve this last goal. I want to be happy and try and spread that happiness to others. 

Here is to you 2018, I am Ready for you! 

Let's do this! :) 

Tata!

TODAY'S CHECKLIST:

  • Exercise: 
    • Cals Out: 1838
    • Steps: 13,823
    • Miles: 5.45
    • Dance: 60 mins
    • Others: 0mins
  • Food: 
    • Breakfast: Fried Eggs (2), Sausage, 
    • Lunch: Roasted Chicken Thigh with Salad.  
    • Snack: String Cheese, Raspberries, Home Made Chocolate
    • Dinner: Ground Beef low carb taco.  
  • Eating: Keto
    • Cals In: 1515
    • Fat: 136 g (80%)
    • Protein: 61 g (16%)
    • Net Carbs: 17 g (4%)
  • Sleep: 5 hrs
  • Study: It's Sunday man! 
  • Read: The Hate U Give (1/52)
  • Feeling: Feeling ready, bring it on, 2018! 

2017 Chapter III Section 14

Super Tired Day 3

Oh my god, I have been so tired every day of the week. 

I wanted to sit down and write but by the time I get free to write, my brain gets all mushy! Sleep sleep, need more sleep!

From tomorrow, I have to make it a point to write, because I have so much to talk about. 

Till then, Tata! 

[P.S. Finally won my first Gym fight (Pokemon) and it made me so super happy! :D Also, I won a gym for an hour before I lost it. People are quite active here and that makes me happy! :)] 

Today's Checklist:

  • Exercise: 9442 Steps
  • Food:
    • Breakfast: Egg Whites, Veggies, Purple Corn Tortilla
    • Lunch: Pasta, Homemade sauce (super healthy)
    • Snack: Instant Noodles. 
    • Dinner: Salad, Diet Canada Dry
  • Study: Stanford (Building Business Models)
  • Read: None
  • Feeling: Tired but happy! :)

2017 Chapter III Section 1

Packing & More

It's been a while since I have written a proper blog. I was not well for a long while. It seems I had severe chest congestion. 

After many antibiotics, gargling and other medicines, I am feeling much better. 

Due to the medicines, I was a little woozy for the past few days and so avoided writing anything. 

Today I spent most of the day packing. I will be leaving next Wednesday for a year to study abroad. 

I am superbly tired, and so I think my excitement has been a little low. But, I am looking forward to being a student again. 

I will be back with a proper blog with my thoughts and emotions. But, for today, that's all! 

Tata! 

TODAY'S CHECKLIST:

  • Exercise: Weight Training, Packing
  • Food:
    • Breakfast: None
    • Lunch: Murighonto, Rice, Maacher Bora
    • Snack: Pre-Run drink, Lactose-Free Milk, Double Egg Roll
    • Dinner: Murighonto, Rice
  • Study: None
  • Read: None
  • Feeling: Packing, packing, packing

2017 Chapter II Section 23

Finally

Remember the event I kept talking about for the last few weeks now? Yes, it finally happened! 

And, I am so happy. The results are joyous! :)

I will talk about it more in better detail in upcoming blogs. 

But for now, I am going to enjoy the moment and relax! 

Health update: Throat still hurts a lot and I have been coughing like crazy! 

Tata! 

TODAY'S CHECKLIST:

  • Exercise: Weight Training
  • Food:
    • Breakfast: Lactose-free Milk, chocos
    • Lunch: Buffet at Marriot (to celebrate today)
    • Snack: Jalapeno poppers, Iced Tea
    • Dinner: Wai wai cup noodles, corn chips 
  • Study: None
  • Read: None
  • Feeling: Feverish yet happy! :)

2017 Chapter II Section 9

I Am a Good Girl

Today was my first day of '15 days of eating right and exercising'. I was a very good girl! 

I ate right, did my exercises but the only thing, though, I slept a lot. I do not know why. 

I just couldn't wake up in the morning. I slept again in the afternoon. But, today my pain is also a little less, so I am not complaining. 

Overall, I am feeling encouraged. 

I wanted to study a bit more today, but I feel very foggy in the head today. 

So, I will just let me have a pass today. It's fine. I know I will make it up tomorrow. 

[I know I talk to my brain like it is a child. I think it might be!!!]

Today I felt like sharing a poem. This one is very close to my heart and whenever I feel lost, or unhappy or feel like I need a boost, I read this. It is not a euphoric poem, but I just love it. 

Well, on that note, I bid you adieu! Enjoy the poem!

Tata! 

Faery Song

- John Keats

Shed no tear! oh, shed no tear!
The flower will bloom another year.
Weep no more! oh, weep no more!
Young buds sleep in the root's white core.
Dry your eyes! oh, dry your eyes!
For I was taught in Paradise
To ease my breast of melodies,--
Shed no tear.

Overhead! look overhead!
'Mong the blossoms white and red--
Look up, look up! I flutter now
On this fresh pomegranate bough.
See me! '
tis this silvery bill
Ever cures the good man's ill.
Shed no tear! oh, shed no tear!
The flower will bloom another year.
Adieu, adieu -- I fly -- adieu!
I vanish in the heaven’s blue,--
Adieu, adieu!


TODAY'S CHECKLIST:

  • Exercise: Weights, 1804 Steps
  • Food:
    • Breakfast: None
    • Lunch: Quinoa, Veggies, Dal
    • Snack: Orange, Jamrul, Narkeli Kul, Cocoa Milkshake with Chia & Flaxseeds
    • Dinner: Quinoa, Eggs, Chicken Stew
  • Study: None
  • Read: None
  • Feeling: Sleepy but happy

2017 Chapter II Section 3

Weigh-In Part 4

Well, I am super happy and super sad today, happy because I got a perfect score on my test. I am doing an online certificate in marketing and innovation from Stanford, and this is the first course I got a perfect score. I have been hovering in the early 90s for a while. So, yeah small joys of life! :) 

I am sad because this week has been a disaster exercise and food wise. I have not eaten right and not exercised well, and it shows in my weigh in today. 

I will just put my numbers in and call it a day and just try to enjoy the little success I got today. 

Tata! 

 

THE STATS FOR THE WEEK:

Date: 03/02/2017

Weight: 87.6 Kgs
Body Fat: 50%
BMI: Obese Class 2
Lean Mass: 43.45 Kgs

Neck: 14.80 Inches
Shoulders: 48 Inches
Chest: 45 Inches
Waist: 44.20 Inches
Hips: 46.20 Inches
Bicep L: 13.20 Inches
Forearm L: 9.8 Inches
Bicep R: 12.70 Inches
Forearm: 9.8 Inches
Thigh L: 27.8 Inches
Calf L: 15.40 Inches
Thigh R: 28.2 Inches
Calf R: 14.70 Inches

TODAY'S CHECKLIST:

  • Exercise: None. I had to run around a lot for some house work and then study! 
  • Food:
    • Breakfast: None
    • Lunch: Fried Rice, Chicken Curry, Palak Paneer
    • Snack: Orange. Fried Rice, Chicken Curry
    • Dinner: Pizza from Domino's (Yes I did something this stupid today), Gingerale
  • Study: Stanford
  • Read: A Clash of Kings
  • Feeling: Super Happy as I got the 100% on the course but super sad because of my weigh in! But, more happy than sad! :P Come on it's a perfect score! 

2017 Chapter I Section 13

Weigh-In Part 1

I am a ridiculously stubborn person. I know what is right for me, and I know the exact solution to many of my problems, but I do not follow them. I do not know, why!? 

Why Arunima, why, why are you like this? Why-why-why? 

So, anyway, I have decided that I need to be held responsible for my health. (Yes, that is how much I care about me, I need to be held accountable on a social platform or else I am just too lazy to take care! Ain't I the beacon of humankind?) 

This is, of course, for none, other than ME. But, apparently, this is the only way to get my brain to understand. I hope!

So, about 18 days back, I started my 'need to get fit' routine, but I haven't kept an account of anything much. So, I have decided to keep a tab on it from now on.
 
Fridays will be my 'weigh in' day. Last time I had measured was 18 days ago. Since then I have lost 2 kgs and 4% body fat. I have also lost a few inches from different parts of my body. Whoopee! :D

Though the progress is not that bad, I have not been able to get my food routine in control. More than often I eat things I am not supposed to and in quantities, I am not supposed to. 

I have been exercising almost every day, either walking or some form of cardio and, in between, also did some weights and interval training. But, they have been very Hodgepodge. 

I want to make it more regular and a little more planned. I do have a proper meal plan and an exercise plan which I had followed once earlier which were made by experts in the field (I mean a trainer and a dietician). 

I have even done my research and modified it to fit my current dietary requirements and exercise needs. I just need to follow it correctly! 

Well, here is to hoping my brain is reading this as I write it. (Yes, I think I am two persons in one, I contradict me more than anyone I have ever met.)

Anyway, these are the stats:

Date: 13/01/2017

  • Weight: 87.1 Kgs
  • Body Fat: 52%
  • BMI: Obese Class 2
  • Lean Mass: 41.81 Kgs
  • Neck: 14.50 Inches
  • Shoulders: 45 Inches
  • Chest: 44.20 Inches
  • Waist: 45.20 Inches
  • Hips: 46.70 Inches
  • Bicep L: 13.30 Inches
  • Forearm L: 9.8 Inches
  • Bicep R: 12.50 Inches 
  • Forearm: 9.8 Inches
  • Thigh L: 26.8 Inches
  • Calf L: 15.70 Inches
  • Thigh R: 27 Inches
  • Calf R: 14.70 Inches

 

TODAY'S CHECKLIST:

  • Exercise: Fitstar First Session,  4002 Steps.
  • Food:
    • Breakfast: None, I woke up at 11!!!!! 
    • Lunch: Quinoa, Dal, Veggies. 
    • Snack: Pizza! (I am ashamed but all of us felt like having pizza)
    • Dinner: Salad
  • Study: Stanford. Half a module. 
  • Read: None.
  • Feeling: Started the day off feeling groggy and lost, now feeling more focused and happier. 

2017 Chapter I Section 7

A week in review

2:58 IST, I just watched a video about writer John Green go through some intense gym routines in his 100 days challenge, and I felt like my challenge isn't off to a good start. 

I haven't lost any weight or inches (which is fine), and in general, I have been highly indisciplined in my food and exercise schedule. I have eaten a lot of white bread and parathas, etc. Things I shouldn't be eating at all. 

I have started walking more, mostly thanks to Pokemon Go, but they are neither consistent in the distance nor regular. I haven't done a single day of weight training or heavy cardio! 

I thought today would be the day, I sit and positively review my first week's progress. Disappointing. 

I am scolding myself, of course! Do I have any other choice currently? 

And, my sleep pattern. Oh, sweet lord, it is not okay, evidently, since I am awake and writing this at 3 in the morning! 

I know I have been worried in life about things and stuff, but that doesn't mean I do not do the simple tasks that will lead me to a better healthy life. 

Let me try and sleep. My brain has to think of every worry in the world, right now. Sheesh. I am dealing with a child here. 

21:32 IST, well, the rest of the day wasn't a complete waste. I did go out to walk a bit. And, I was a good girl and did not eat any of the bad foods. 
I need to inspire me more. I feel like I am letting my worried head get the better of me. I need to calm it down and just go for it. 

I need to stick to my schedule better. I know when I do that, my worrying nature calms down a lot. I have mild OCD and have realised exercising and following a set routine makes me feel better. 

Well, I end today's blog, hoping for a more productive next week. 


TODAY'S CHECKLIST:

  • Exercise: Walked 2357 steps 
  • Food:
    • Breakfast: None
    • Lunch: Rice, Aloo Posto, Rajma
    • Snack: Super Drink, a bit of churmur
    • Dinner: Palak chicken roll in a oats based roti 
  • Study: Stanford Certificate. Finished an assignment
  • Read: None
  • Feeling: Happy, looking forward to Sunday

2017 Chapter I Section 6

Blast from the Past! 

OH MY GOD! What a fantastic day it was! I did not think my day would end this way! I love it. 

I met my childhood friend, my sister from another mother, after 10 Years! 10 YEARS! And, the best part, nothing has changed. We are still the same crazy kids we used to be. 

Due to circumstances and life and long distances between us, we had fallen apart for a while. But, today it felt like nothing has changed as if life had stood still for us. 

We became friends when I was 13, and we are inseparable. She is older than I am but that never was an issue for us. 

As a kid, I didn't have a lot of friends. We lived in the same neighbourhood and to be honest I somehow never really fit in with others. 

I used to go for English classes to her mother's house, and that's how we met. I always thought we were cool kids. We talked about everything under the sun. From books to boys to nothing at all. 

What I loved about our friendship was we were very different, yet somewhere we were the same person. 

Her house was on the next street to mine, so I used to spend most of my time after school at her house. 

Every day, even on days when I did not have my English classes with her mother, I would show up at her doorsteps. Then, we would go for long walks to chat. We would walk for hours, yes hours. We had a particular route we would follow. And, every day it ended with getting 'papri chat' at our favourite 'Chaat' guy at this local shopping mall area, Dakhsinapan. 

It was my daily routine. These walks are some of my fondest memories of my childhood. 

She moved to Bangalore to study and then I moved to Pune for my Master's and somewhere in between, not sure exactly when, we stopped talking every day. 

It wasn't like we entirely stopped talking, but we somehow fell apart. I never did feel like I lost a friend, though. I always knew she was there. 

Somehow in the past ten years, we were never in the same city at the same time. And, then, life happened to us both. So, all this took us away from each other. 

I do not know what the future holds, but I cannot be happier for this one day. I felt like we were those two young kids, roaming around, talking our hearts out and just loving life as it is. 

TODAY'S CHECKLIST:

  • Exercise: Walked 4117 steps. 
  • Food:
    • Breakfast: Boiled egg and bread 
    • Lunch: Quinoa, Mixed vegetable, Dal, Fish 
    • Snack: Biriyani!!! (Was outside and got super hungry)
    • Dinner: Palak Chicken and two rotis. 
  • Study: 30 mins of French 
  • Read: None
  • Feeling: Ecstatic!! :D Cannot stop smiling.  

2017 Chapter I Section 5

The Day I did Nothing!

Maybe it is because of my non-stop periods for over 20 days or maybe it's the weather or maybe I am depressed or maybe, just maybe because I am plain lazy, but today I just did not feel like doing anything. 

[Note to self: I think it's becoming an everyday thing. Need to keep a check on it. *Insert thoughtful smiley*]

Anyway, the day started off in the laziest fashion possible. There was a nice breeze in the morning, and everything felt new and fresh. I felt like going on a picnic. But, I settled for a good breakfast. 

After reading and finishing my French lessons, I had planned to study, but my mind kept wondering off. I decided to spend some time chatting with my mother. She and I though had a rocky start (I mean my birth and us not being that close in my childhood) but now I consider her to be one of my closest friends and confidants. 

She was telling me about a Bengali film, Bomkyesh Bakshi and how it was quite good and I should watch it before it leaves the theaters. She had already seen it with my father, so I had to go alone. 

Going for the film alone, turned out to be a good decision. Not only did I enjoy some 'me' time, but it also gave a lot of time to observe others. 

I call myself an "artful voyeur" (Did you guess the reference? No, don't google please, come on). No, I do not take any perverse pleasure in looking at others, but I do love to observe people. Their movements and gestures and how they talk and interact with each other. 

I am not sure when I started doing that, but I love to sit in one place while the world does its thing around me. I like to be a "fly on the wall". 

With technology abound, this has become less of a practice nowadays. And, if I go out with others, I do pay more attention to the person with me, than the ones without. 

While I observe, I try not to pry into anyone's personal matters. It is of no interest to me, and no I do not sit and stare at people. I just like to imagine what lives they lead. I feel like there must be a story everywhere. 

Like, today after the film got over, I decided to sit at a coffee shop and catch up on my daily dose of Pokemon Go (I am at level 14 and feel quite stupidly happy about it). While waiting for Pokemon to show up, I noticed two young girls sitting at the opposite table to mine. 

They seemed to be in college, and they were having an intense conversation. One girl was talking quite animatedly and looked quite worked up about something, and the other one was timidly and quietly listening to everything that was being said. 

Now, I obviously do not know what they were talking about, but my mind immediately made up a story about them. 

Story: The timid girl has a cheating boyfriend, and she has finally caught him red handed. The angry girl is telling her to break up with him as he is not worth her time. He is a bad person and hurting her, and she needs to see that. The timid girl is obviously in love with him and cannot easily break up with him, and so she is feeling rather sad about the inevitable decision. The angry girl realises that and is trying to encourage her friend. 

[Note to self: I think this is too mainstream, Nah, that's not what had happened. Too Bollywoodish.]

Story 2: The timid girl has lied to her friend about something, and the angry girl has gotten to know about it. She is now angry and... (Sorry, Pokemon break)

Oh yaaayeee a Pinser, woah it has 789 CP, must catch it!!! 

Yes, caught it! Oh wait, where was I? By the time, I looked up; both the girls looked happy, and I didn't feel like going back to the sad backstory. 

I then got distracted for the next 5-7 minutes because my Lure Module had worked and there was quite a few Pokemon roaming around the coffee shop. Conveniently the Poke Stop was just a few steps away from the cafe. :D 

My mother had told me to get some 'churmur' while coming back. So, I advanced towards the 'Puchka' guy and placed my order. I waited impatiently looking for a new Pokemon while a girl and boy finished their rounds of 'puchkas'. They were talking about how lucky they are; they hit upon a Poke Stop with a Lure Module. 

No, I wasn't eavesdropping, they were just loud and close enough for me to overhear! -_-

I smirked to myself and thought, 'yeah, that's because of me, you can thank me later.' They seemed quite jubilant. I thought, 'ahhh must have caught some good ones'. 

I was about to go on another of my dream sequences when the 'Puchkawala' handed over my order. 

I decided to take the longer route home. I enjoyed walking in the garden/jogger's path in our housing complex. It was mildly cool weather, and the distant laughs of children playing mixed with the sweet smell of the winter flowers made me feel light and uplifted. I felt like a child again, full of wonder and excitement. 

[Note to self: I should start walking again.]

Though I didn't do a single thing I had planned to and ordinarily this would make me feel disappointed, yet today I end this day on a high note. I feel like my mind feels broader and oddly more focused. 

I feel like I can do anything I put my mind to! 

TODAY'S CHECKLIST:

  • Exercise: Walked 4750 steps. 
  • Food:
    • Breakfast: Boiled egg 
    • Lunch: Quinoa, Mixed vegetable, Dal 
    • Snack: Popcorn ( a little bit at the movies, I mostly got it back for Ma), coffee, Cheese toastie. (one bread)
    • Dinner: Salad
  • Study: 30 mins of French 
  • Read: None
  • Feeling: Quite Happy and pleasant